Our Loves Must Also be Surrendered to God

It cannot be doubted, that it is right for a man to love the members of his family, and that it is his duty to do so; but if his domestic attachments become from any cause so strong as to annul or to vitiate his love to men generally or to God, or on the other hand if they become so weakened as to fall short of the divine requirements, they are wrong.

Immutable right has a claim and a power, which entitle it to regulate every thing else. Even LOVE itself, an element so essential to all moral goodness that it gives a character and name to God himself, ceases to be love, the moment it ceases to be in conformity with justice. Love, that is not just, is not holy; and love, that is not holy, is selfishness under the name of love. Every affection, therefore, however amiable and honorable it may be when it is in a right position, is wrong and is at variance with inward holiness of life, which is not in conformity with the rule of right. And in hearts unsanctified, just so far as there is a defect or want of sanctification, in other words just so far as the love of God fails to regulate such affections, this is always the case.

— edited from The interior or Hidden Life (1844) Part 2, Chapter 9.