From the way this topic is often discussed, it’s easy to get the impression that
perfect love, according to the Gospel, is essentially the same thing as sanctification or holiness — and in truth, that understanding is largely correct. Scripture consistently treats those who are perfected in love as people who are accepted, sanctified, and holy. Even though such people still have weaknesses and make mistakes — and even though they must continually rely on Christ’s atonement for both present failings and past sins — they are nonetheless regarded in the New Testament as truly holy.
For that reason, anyone who is sincerely and unselfishly seeking perfect love can rightly be said to be seeking holiness.
That said, experience shows that there is a serious and subtle mistake that some people make along the way. Even when they genuinely desire sanctification and believe they are pursuing it properly, they sometimes confuse love with joy. Without fully realizing it, they end up chasing an intense, emotionally uplifting state rather than true love itself. This is likely what Lady Maxwell was pointing to when she said,
“The Lord has taught me that it is by faith, and not joy, that I must live.”